Within the Digestive Tract of the Mighty Sarlacc

Source of Anger and Frustration No 1:

The cavernous gaping maw that sits in my office and emits a constant dull whine while emanating an aura of vulgarity, ignorance and quiet bigotry.


Alternative Descriptive Words and Phrases :

• Fucking Moron
• Emotional Vampire
• Jabba the Bristolian Hutt
• Xenaphobic Idiot
• Vulgar and Common (this one does not sit well with me because it makes me feel like a snob - even though I have used this phrase repeatedly when discussing the subject at hand)
• Slackjawed, gibbering Daily Mail reader
• Gelantinous mass of indolent flesh
• Closed minded, bigoted, joy stealing, portion control avoiding, hidebound, thundercunt!

Please feel free to help in my quest to become the world's most creative imparter of insults by leaving suggestions in the comments box.

I shall doubtelss revisit this subject as it is a constant source of underlying irritation... not unlike water torture, I should imagine.